Energy Vampires are no Treat; Here are some Tricks to deal with them

There are some people in this world who suck the life right out of you! You know the ones I’m talking about. They are energy vampires. These people demand your attention and don’t respect your time, energy or space. They test your patience, tax your last nerve and you are literally drained and exhausted when you’re around them. Energy vampires are very real and once they’ve gotten their fangs into you it is not only exhausting but the encounter can literally haunt you for days, months or in some cases even years!

Energy vampires don’t always know they are sucking the life out of you. They walk around like zombies full of negativity, drama and pain which they pass around until someone (who is usually trying to help them) becomes the dumping ground. The more you try to help by giving them advice, giving them your valuable time & energy and  giving them a forum to vent, the more you give away. That’s a lot of giving! Not to sound like Dr. Phil but what are you receiving from this relationship?

Yes, there are energy vampires out there but it is beneficial to look at your part in the relationship. What generally happens is you’ve given them permission to do this. You’ve given up your space to them. You are healing them and allowing solving their problems and their life process to become more important than your own. When dealing with energy vampires as well as being exhausted, you are probably thinking about them and how to ‘help’ but you can’t solve someone else’s problems or take on their pain. Knowingly, why would you want to? It’s fine to want to help someone but if they can’t “have” the help you are giving and don’t take steps to heal themselves you might want to re-evaluate your relationship with them.

At some point after they’ve sucked the life out of you time and time again your awareness will kick in and you get angry. The funny (not haha funny) thing about an energy vampire is they’ve learned to do what they do much like Armand taught Lestat how to be a vampire in Anne Rice’s Vampire chronicles. If you continue to allow them to suck you dry, you have taught them it’s OK to do so. When dealing with energy vampires you will notice that most everything in the vampire’s life including friends, family and work relationships involve some sort of drama and if it’s not their personal drama they are probably complaining, blaming others or gossiping about someone else.

One reason you get sucked in to someone else’s drama is because you are sensitive to others pain because you’ve experienced it in one form or another. You’ll notice that you are most vulnerable when you are happy. It is said that misery loves company and energy vampires tend to bring you down to their level….if you allow it!

Here are a few things to do when there’s an energy vampire on the loose:

  1. Forgive yourself! This is important. You were in a sense ‘sucked in’ to the negative vortex. Now that you recognize what’s happening you can effectively take your course of action.
  2. Forgive them and clear the resistance! Forgiveness is a powerful way to clear energy. Energy vampires have probably been sucking people dry for a very long time and don’t realize it. Forgiving doesn’t mean allowing them to do it. It means forgiving them and sending them on their way.
  3. Set boundaries and own your space! Do this from a non-effort, neutral place. Owning your space is the best way to set boundaries.
  4. Value your loving nature, time & energy! What you have to give has value. Your time & energy has value. Think of it as if it were money. How much would you give to others at the cost of your own needs?
  5. Cut the cords and raise your vibration! If necessary, you may need to end the relationship. No one can take your energy or drag you down without your permission at some level. I know that’s hard to hear but it really is up to you.

Dealing with energy vampires is never easy particularly if you are highly sensitive, have health issues and/or challenges of your own. My friend Jen Reynolds addresses this in a great piece she wrote for her Fibro TV blog. It’s never easy to sever a relationship of any kind but sometimes it must be done for your own health and well-being.

Remember it is your right and within your power to say no and stop the energy vampire dead in their tracks! Call back your energy from the takers! Your happy life blood is yours to infuse into YOUR life! Help those who can receive your gifts and move on from those who suck you dry!~Shine Your Light Debbie

©Debra Taitel  2011-2012 All rights reserved

SpiritLightInsight.com

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How would you spend 525,600?

Photo Courtesy of Kate Janes

Say I were to give you $525,600 per year for the rest of your life. That’s $1440 per day! I’m sure you can think of many ways to spend it but the catch is you can’t spend any of it on yourself! Altruism aside, how would you feel if you were given that amount of money and couldn’t spend any of it…not one dime, on yourself.

To be sure that’s a lot of money and you might get a little angry if I dropped a sack filled with money on your doorstep every year yet none of it was for you. Wouldn’t it be great if we ALL had $525,600 per year, every year for the rest of our lives! The things we could do, places we could go, the things we could see & experience. If you could use it for yourself would you place value on every $1 and use it to enhance not only your life but the lives of those you hold dear?

Certainly with that kind of money coming in every year your life would change. You’d probably relax, take time to focus on those things and people who are important to you. You’d spend your time and energy on things that make you happy now instead of worrying about the future. Now follow along with me here. What if the ‘currency’ I’m really talking about is your TIME and how you value yourself? Do you value your time and energy as much as the value you place on money? Play along with me here for a few moments! 🙂

Every year you have 525,600 valuable minutes. That’s 1440 minutes per day and it renews every year. I wish I could say there is ‘roll-over’ time but that’s it! It’s finite. There is no ‘do over’. Once you’ve ‘spent’ your time it’s done, over, finito. Similar to spending money don’t you think? Every minute has value. What you spend your time and energy focusing on has value just as you have great value. Do you spend some of your precious minutes on YOU? If not it’s very much like the ‘catch’ I mentioned in the beginning of this…you are not placing value on yourself!

So how do you spend your 1440 minutes each day? What could you create with the valuable time you spend thinking about the past or worrying about the future? How many minutes do you spend nurturing your spirit? How many valuable minutes do you string together for beautiful moments in your life?

Noticing where you put your time and energy is the first step toward valuing each moment. With awareness you have a choice about how you’d like to spend your minutes. You can choose to spend time creating wonderful experiences and living life or unable to move forward and stuck in the past. You can choose to love or hate. You can choose to spend your time and energy worrying or creating something new. Whatever you choose, remember that once you’ve spent it, it’s gone and merely a memory. Why not choose to Live On Purpose? 🙂

In the movie “RENT” the song “Seasons of Love” says it best. ‘525,600 moments so dear…how do you measure a year….’ There is value to who and what you spend time loving. There is value to where you place your time and energy. Be sure to spend time on your most valuable resource….YOU!~Shine Your Light Debbie

©Debra Taitel  2010-2012 All rights reserved

SpiritLightInsight.com
Daily Muse Home Page

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