Giving vs. Giving it Away

blueAs a clairvoyant and healer of spirit I’ve recently had the opportunity to give readings to some wonderful people. They all have different backgrounds &  jobs, live in various parts of the country and had very different questions they wanted answered. Before their readings, each one told me they had been feeling depleted and unable to “get things going”.  I looked clairvoyantly at these unique, individual spirits! All bright, beautiful beings in a great deal of growth & accelerated change. What I also noticed, was how much of their energy they had given away and the responsibility that they began taking on from others.

As a healer in my own right, not only do I recognize a healer but I often experience what it’s like to give it all away and to become responsible for someone elses growth.  I recognize this has happened if I’m feeling isolated, unable to create,  sad, angry or depressed for no apparent reason, and I can’t get things going in my own life.  I call it losing my space!

The common thread here is that each one of us is a healer!  We want to help people, listen to them, and make them feel better. If someone is angry or sad we want to cheer them up and make them happy again.  What often happens is that there is a tendency to give it all away. To give a piece of your brightness, YOUR precious energy,  to someone else in order to heal them. When you give away your energy you can feel depleted. You may also have taken on the responsibility for someone elses pain. This is particularly true when I look at energy workers, mediums or healing practitioners.

Here’s an example of what I mean. Are YOU the person everyone turns to when they are having problems? Have you ever been talking with someone felt so BAD for this person you couldn’t stop thinking about them and how to help? How about being so worried about…(whatever or whomever it is) that you could actually feel the pain? Have you ever felt like a dumping ground for other peoples problems?  If you’ve experienced  any of this you may have noticed that afterwards they may have said something like ‘thanks I feel better now’. Then the question is how did YOU feel afterward?

If you have given away your energy or taken on any of theirs,  my guess is  that you weren’t feeling so great! Now I’m not suggesting here that you shouldn’t help people and heal them but you don’t need to “match” what is happening with them or take on the energy and become responsible for what they are going through. You can support them, be compassionate, empathize, listen, hug them and hold their hand but you don’t need to actually FEEL and take on their pain, sadness, depression etc. In more simple terms, you don’t have to lose your space:-)

Here’s the good news…if you’ve lost your space you can get it back! It’s as simple as getting grounded, centered and creating the intent to call your energy back from wherever you left it. Bring your attention back to YOU! Allow your energy to flow back into you from the top of your head to the tips of your toes! Fill yourself up with your joy, enthusiasm, amusement and the unique energy of YOU, the bright being that you are and see what happens!~Shine your light Debbie 🙂

©Debra Taitel 2009-2011 All rights reserved

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4 thoughts on “Giving vs. Giving it Away

  1. Oh yes, this does ring true to me. There was someone who used to call me and explain with great drama and detail the current tragedies in his life. It was so very, very draining. I tried to explain this to him once, and his response was, “Oh, but you always know exactly what to say to make me feel better!”

    I wasn’t intending to stop him from seeking support.. just to tone it down a little.. perhaps not tell me every graphic detail and not leave me voicemails always saying there was a crisis and that he needed to talk to me RIGHT AWAY. But he did not seem to be able to do that—it was as though he had just one level for his emotions: Intense!

    Sigh.. I eventually did have to limit the interaction to emails. It was still intense, but at least I could decide to read them when I felt “strong” enough. Eventually he stopped writing.. I think he found someone else to call.

    This was an extreme example … fortunately. 🙂

    Debbie, your advice about not matching someone’s energy or losing your space is very helpful. And.. how to get it back if you have become unsettled and need to become centered again.

    I’ve found that by taking a walk in nature, doing something with my children that they really enjoy, or spending time with our pets .. these are the types of things that help me come back to where I need to be.


    Luved this article and so in time n in tune to what i have been contemplating about…and am making a change to that effect …and its wonderful how ppl reflect rather how life reflects our inner beliefs…Life so Transparent…just gotta be open n aware…
    Thanks Again lovely article ..though there are others i hve yet to run thru..surely like everytime on time whn i need to hear or read it!

    Luv n Light!

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