Memorial Day Gratitude; Words are not enough…

Memorial Day in the United States has changed from its civil war roots originally called Decoration Day. It has become a day for honoring those who serve(d) in the armed forces. This is a day to put aside any judgement about war and honor those who fought (and are still fighting) bravely. It is time to pause and reflect upon the true meaning of Memorial Day and not just consider this day as the unofficial start of summer.

It is a sad truth that war exists but it does. It is a part of history in almost every country. Whether it be a civil war, the fight for freedom, human rights or against tyranny there are those who step up and take on the duty of serving and protecting. There are many reasons men and women join the armed forces but the fact remains they are stepping up with the knowledge that they might have to go into battle at some point. They step up when they KNOW they could lose their lives. Even those who were drafted in years past fought for their lives and ours. Many paid the price and made the ultimate sacrifice in the name of freedom.

War is not pretty and leaves a mark on everyone and everything it touches; Soldiers, family, friends and the countries where the wars take place. It leaves a mark on each one of us as we watch with horror from our homes. Saying thank you isn’t enough. One day of honor and memorial isn’t enough. Mere words are not enough nor is placing flowers or a flag on a gravestone but it is all we can do.

To those who have put their lives on the line for us; To those who put their lives on the line to help others be free; To the families of those who lost their lives in the line of duty let us say thank you. Let us honor this day and give thought to the meaning of memorial day and how our lives have changed because of these brave souls who took on the huge responsibility of defending our country and fighting for democracy and freedom all over the world.

We honor you and thank you for your service. We honor those who lost their lives and pray that those who fought and returned find love and peace in their hearts again. We say thank you and pray for the families of those who made the ultimate sacrifice. We say thank you and honor each and every person who stepped up to sign up. We say thank you and honor those who were drafted. On this memorial day please join me in a moment of silence to honor, say thank you and send out the vibration of gratitude, appreciation and peace to our veterans past and present. It is with the utmost respect, gratitude and appreciation that we say THANK YOU for your service! You ARE appreciated and words are simply not enough…..~Shine Your Light Debbie

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May 20 2012

Behold the ‘Ring of Fire’! Today’s solar eclipse (May 20, 2012) marks a new beginning!

Today is ‘the ring of fire’ new moon solar eclipse! Are you ready? Ready or not eclipses have the power to literally ‘eclipse out’ things in your life that no longer serve you, freeing up your valuable time and energy. They also mark the beginning of something new. Today is a great day to clear the fog, re-gain your footing, set new intentions, create new opportunities and open your mind to limitless possibilities!

Everyone is being affected by this particular cosmic event and it may feel like you are on information overload. While I am not an astrologer I do read energy and in the days leading up to this particular eclipse I’ve been contacted by many who are experiencing disturbing dreams and unfounded fears as well as a seemingly abrupt awakening. The truth is showing itself and it can be unnerving and disconcerting when it does.

Since an eclipse is always about endings and beginnings you may find clarity about past events and you may decide to embark upon a new path. With every “step up” comes a letting go and there is a grieving process which is a natural part of the process. As you find clarity during this powerful time the answers you seek and those people or situations which are not in alignment with your path will become obvious. An eclipse will magnify and in essence show you the ’cracks’ (and what seeped into those cracks) in your foundation. This is a great time to end those chapters of your life (resolve issues or agreements from the past), fill in and seal up the cracks (with love and forgiveness for yourself and others), and allow the power of the eclipse to propel you forward into your new beginning!

Clarity is not only about seeing what has passed so you can resolve past issues. It is about seeing with clarity those things you wish to create. Having a clear picture of where you want to go and what you want to do helps you build a foundation for the future and there is no better time than today to harness the power of the eclipse to help you do that!

There are many more astrological aspects to this eclipse but I’ll leave those to the wonderful star gazers and astrologers out there. The information presented is for you to know that eclipses cause abrupt awakenings and transformations so if you’ve felt ‘off’ and overwhelmed you are not alone! Take comfort in the fact that this to shall pass and you have a lot to look forward to from this day forward! Use today’s powerful conjunction of the new moon solar eclipse in Gemini plus the alignment with the Pleiades to open new doors. Set your intentions for doors to open, new opportunities to present themselves and beautiful new beginnings!~Shine Your Light Debbie

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May 17 2012

Does Fear Hold you Hostage?

“To fear is one thing. To let fear grab you by the tail and swing you around is another.”~Katherine Paterson, Jacob Have I Loved

Fear is a powerful energy which, if allowed to grow, can hold you hostage. It is gripping and debilitating and at times it feels like you are being held in a state a suspended animation until it finally lets loose its grip. When your mind is occupied by fear it not only takes over your thoughts but sends out a vibration of fear which can actually cause what it is you fear to manifest.

Everyone has fears but as the opening quote says; “To fear is one thing. To let fear grab you by the tail and swing you around is another.”

Living in Chicago I have a first hand seat in watching how the energy of fear can take over as we approach the upcoming NATO Summit. I admit that perhaps I have a jaded view of a worldwide event being an exciting time however with the city going on virtual lockdown due to possible terrorist and/or unruly protest activity one can feel the fear in the air. The fear mongering media is not helping nor are those (whom I consider) irresponsible ‘spokespeople’ for the various protest groups descending on the city. One friend called it ‘fear porn’. It is spreading like wildfire and just as a wildfire needs fuel to grow, every person who allows fear to take over feeds the fire and gives it strength. This is not to say don’t be cautious, alert and do what you need to do for your safety when fear comes up but don’t allow your fear to fuel the fire. As you know, a fire which is not fed soon burns out.

Fear is an energy…

The energy of fear can help or hinder you. In terms of the physical body fear is useful and triggers a fight or flight response in times of imminent danger but how many of the fears you now face are based on real danger? How much of that fear is based on fact and what is it that you really fear? Most often fear comes from what you ‘think’ might happen in the future or something that happened in the past. In terms of what might happen in the future, how many scenes have played out in your mind with a negative outcome therefore fueling your fear? If you are afraid to fly, for example; Are you really afraid to fly or are you afraid you might die or are you afraid because someone else is in control of flying the plane? If your imagination runs rampant and you fuel horrible images the fear is going to grow and it will indeed hold you hostage.

If it comes from a past experience it could be an important lesson like don’t take the hot cookie sheet out of the oven without using a pot-holder but it could also be that you got hurt in a relationship and the fear of getting hurt stops you from loving again. One is based on reality and one is based on energy you hold from the past. Now, if your intuition kicks in listen to it! The fears I’m referring to are those you hold on to resulting in a pattern of negative thoughts which are fueled and grow until they take over; The fears which “grab you by the tail and swing you around.”

It’s important to face your fears head on and decide if the fear is even yours. If you are matching someone else’s picture of fear or take on fears of others you are being held hostage. Don’t feed it, fuel it or obsess about it. Release yourself from the prison of fear by refusing to fuel the fire and letting it go. Find the truth of your fears. Are they fact or fiction? Fuel the fires of passion, love and creativity! Feed the flames that lead to your dreams coming true! Build a bonfire of joy and fuel it until it quickly becomes a wildfire touching every part of your life!~Shine Your Light Debbie

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Photo: Fire Heart © Ba-mi | Dreamstime.com

May 10 2012

Finding Validation in an Invalidating World….

Once again I find it’s time to write about a particular energy trend emerging in reading sessions. That trend is validation or perhaps more to the point, why are we so invalidated that we seek validation outside of ourselves? In a vast world full of competition it’s difficult to validate our own self. Seeking recognition from others is looking outside yourself. There’s nothing wrong with wanting validation but it’s important to be able to validate YOURSELF so you can accept and ‘have’ the validation you receive from others.

Why is it so hard to validate ourselves?

Validating ones self is not easy because you’ve simply been taught from a very young age not to. It’s ok to validate someone else but it’s considered egotistical if you validate yourself. Why is it ok to validate and recognize others but not yourself? Validating yourself is not about praising yourself publicly. It’s ok to be proud of what you’ve accomplished and there’s nothing wrong with telling people BUT constantly shouting your good deeds from the rooftops and telling others how amazing you are time and time again is actually you wanting others to validate you. Validation like everything else is an energy and sometimes the invalidation you carry causes you to see things and react through the filters caused by that invalidation.

How much validation can you have?

Perhaps you’ve been recognized but in your heart you don’t feel like you deserve the recognition because in your eyes it wasn’t good enough. I’ll bet that some time in your past you did, said or created something you were proud of and felt good about only to have someone else invalidate it. If that happened and you owned what they told you as truth at some level you’re holding on to the energy of invalidation and it has had an effect on everything you’ve done since that time. In order to have validation from others you must be able to validate yourself and know inside that what you do or say has value to YOU.

Until you can validate yourself it will never be enough….

No matter how much recognition you receive or from whom, until you can validate yourself it will be fleeting at best. Receiving an award (or recognition) is wonderful but what happens after your 15 minutes of fame is over? Can you validate yourself for it or do you find yourself trying to figure out how to do it again? Have you spent your life trying to get validation from a particular person yet you are ignored or you feel like you always say the wrong thing and try to correct it? Do you feel like nothing you do or say is good enough in the eyes of another? Are you validating yourself with food or sex or shopping or some other addiction which makes you feel good for merely a moment? Some people shop so they have lots of “things” but do those “things” really validate you? Some people validate their bodies with food only to beat themselves up later for gaining weight or feeling awful. Some are in effort trying to be the “top dog” who makes the most money so all they do is work. None of those things work.

Recognition and validation from others is a beautiful thing but so is validating yourself and accepting validation from others humbly and with grace. It is up to you to find what validates you. Does a job well done make you stand back and smile without someone else telling you? Can you graciously accept and know with all your heart that you deserve validation from others? Can you give to others without expectation of receiving anything in return and you feel good about it? In the world today it’s difficult even under the best of circumstances to receive a spirit to spirit HELLO. If your spirit does not get a HELLO it causes you to feel empty, alone, ignored and invalidated. A simple hello while looking into someones eyes is a huge validation for both of you. You saying hello to your own spirit validates you.

Finding validation in an invalidating world means you validate yourself as well as others. It’s also important to be aware of the validation you receive every day. If you’re looking for validation scroll down to the end of this post and enjoy one of my favorite videos on the subject. This short film called VALIDATION does show how a bit of validation can change your inner and outer world. Let me finish by saying….HELLO! YOU ARE AMAZING! YOU HAVE VALUE! Can you see these things about you for yourself?~Shine Your Light Debbie

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May 6 2012

Experiencing the Golden Age & Surviving the Shift with Ease

There is an interesting phenomenon happening now. It seems as if there is a bright, blinding light shining on challenges and the ghosts from the past are showing themselves. We are being asked to take a step up in vibration and as this happens universally we all must take ownership of what is happening individually. How are you feeling these days? Does it feel like your personal challenges are enhanced to the 10th degree? Are you more stressed than usual? Do you encounter “stop” energy at every turn? if you answered yes to any of those questions you are not alone. Many people are having the same experience and because everything is so magnified now it’s easy to get caught up in our own “stuff”.

What you are experiencing is a shift in the energies and a call to action so to speak. You are being given a choice to step up or step aside. Many people are deciding to change directions or they are at a crossroads in their lives. Any time one decides to change directions, you can be sure that all the energies you still need (or want) to work on will be magnified and it will be difficult to move forward until you clear them. If you truly want to change direction and move forward, what you do with today will have a direct impact on where you want to go. Your “call to action” may actually consist of quieting the mind and just “being” for a short time each day. I find it interesting that a lot of people want to shove the energies into the background instead of looking at and facing them head on then clearing them. This is not a ‘bad’ thing to do but if you don’t release what is holding them in place rest assured you will have to do it later.

Surviving the shift definitely means getting in touch with a part of you that may have been dormant for some time. Once awakened, it’s like shaking an apple tree. All the loose apples and dead twigs & leaves are going to fall out and you can leave them rotting on the ground at your feet wallowing in them or take a giant golden rake and get rid of all the debris. In order to experience a personal “golden age” you must shake your tree, release the old and create it for yourself. During times of great challenge you must connect with your “inner GPS” and fully trust that there is a greater purpose to what’s happening and that you are indeed moving in the right direction. Allow your intuition to guide you and trust it!

Experiencing the coming of a personal golden age never comes without its challenges. You know it’s coming when you’re feeling like life is accelerating out of control, everything is magnified and it all feels a bit overwhelming. All of those things are signs you are shaking up the energy to move past it. In order to create calm from chaos you must make time for yourself lest you get even more caught up in the busy-ness of life. The choice really is yours. You can meet the shift with grace, clear the energies and create your golden age now or you can do it later. Here’s the thing the shift is happening and it’s not going away. Wouldn’t you rather experience the golden age sooner than later?

The “Golden Age” is a period of peace, harmony, stability, and prosperity and you can choose to have it now. Decide to see the positive not focus on the negative. Follow your intuition and connect with your passion. Your golden age is created by being in the here and now. In your mind’s eye visualise golden suns and bring them in through the top of your head. Surround yourself in the golden light of peace and harmony. Bask in the golden light of universal love.~Shine Your Light Debbie

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Apr 29 2012

Ready for a Spiritual Makeover?

Einstein’s definition of insanity is “doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results”. This is not to say you’re insane but if you think about the quote it’s right on target. If you are doing the same things over and over and expecting different results it might be time for a spiritual makeover.

What is a spiritual makeover?

A spiritual makeover is exactly what it sounds like. It’s when you clear energies or programming which are not inherently yours from mind, body, spirit and soul then filling up with your own unique spiritual essence. A spiritual makeover not only brightens your aura but gives you more space to breathe and create. This same makeover allows you to connect with your own spiritual purpose and have a deeper level of understanding the process. Many people focus on the positive and things they want which exist only outside of themselves without knowing how to bring it in. The physical manifestations come with knowing how to bring more of your spiritual ethereal body in. In simple terms if you can’t have more of YOU how can you have more of anything else?

If you think you’re moving in the right direction like you meditate (now and then), you keep a gratitude journal (sometimes), you focus on the positive(when possible), you work the law of attraction (when things aren’t coming to you) and yet things still aren’t happening or manifesting try focusing on having more of YOU! Also take a look at what’s written in the parenthesis. More often than not I see people working these spaces when things aren’t going the way they’d like. If you truly want a spiritual makeover it’s important to do these things daily. Your ‘tricks of the trade’ are always available but are you only using them when you have a problem that needs solving? Whatever modality you personally use, do you only do it when things aren’t going well or you don’t feel good? Meditation (of any types) is not a part-time ‘sport’ designed to solve problems. So if you’re ready…..

Your Spiritual Makeover Begins Here!

Just like getting a new hair style, wardrobe or makeup the results go beyond just making you look good. A physical make over leaves you feeling fresh, alive and when done right makes you feel and look like a different person. When you take the steps toward a spiritual makeover, it’s going to do the same thing on both the inside and the outside! If you’re ready for a spiritual makeover here are a few steps you can take:

Meditate Daily~Find a class to experience the energy. Listen to guided meditations*. Ground. Make time and space for meditating. Don’t just consider 5 minutes in the shower a meditation (although that may be where you need to start) Also take baby steps to quiet your mind and find peace within. Start with 5 minutes then 10 etc.
Start a “30 days to change” Gratitude/Validation Journal~Specifically include at least 5 things you love about yourself and validate your good choices. This brings the energy into present time and generates gratitude and love. Be sure to come back here and share your experiences in the comments section. I guarantee you will see great changes in your life by the end of those 30 days!
Imagine Yourself in a Gold Bubble~Validate you are spirit in a body. Fill up with your energy and allow it to surround you. Notice if the gold bubble changes into several layers of different colors and hues dancing around you. This is the spiritual space commonly known as your aura.

Now you have a few very simple tools for your very own spiritual makeover. They are not complicated, there are no special postures and when used every day will create great change as well as bring a sense of peace, calm and hope. Practice when it doesn’t count until it comes naturally. Your aura will shine and people might even ask if you’ve gotten a new hair style…and let me add here…YOU LOOK FABULOUS!~Shine Your Light Debbie

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Apr 20 2012

Listen to Your Body it has LOTS to Say!

“The mind’s first step to self-awareness must be through the body.”~George Sheehan

As spiritual beings having a human experience it’s important to take care of your body and listen to it. Your body gives you a lot of feedback and many times that feedback is ignored because of the latest diet or exercise trend or the ego mind gets in the way. When it comes to your body ‘one size fits all’ does not come into play nor does it mean that NOW you can do what you did in the past. Very simply, bodies and needs change over time. If you don’t feel good, by all means try something new but listen and pay attention to what your body is telling you to know if it’s the right thing for you.

I should probably call this post “Reflections of a Carbohydrate Addict” but in the interest of keeping in the spirit of this healing mind, body, & spirit blog the current title will suffice. I want to also be clear that if you are doing something that works for you and you’re feeling physically good (or better than you did) by eating a certain diet I not only applaud your choices but will support you in any way I can. The story I’m about to share is for you to shift your attention and have you check in with your own body to see what’s working and what’s not. Awareness and listening are powerful tools which help with your ability to create change. In other words; You can’t change what you aren’t aware of.

Every Body Tells a Story

First I’d like to confess that I am a carbohydrate addict! In my freezer there is a ‘bread for all reasons’. I eat a healthy, balanced diet. I’m a lifetime Weight Watcher member (I’m also a WW leader) having lost 86 lbs and still work the program. As I got older my body changed and I started to put on a sneaky little one pound a year. I wasn’t worried because after all it was only one pound and I’ll take it off tomorrow. Sound familiar? One pound added up to two, then to eight, then to 10. RED ALERT! I re-focused my efforts but a funny thing happens after 50. What was once relatively easy to do becomes a struggle. As your body and hormones change (for both men and women) you not only need to step up the exercise to balance out natural muscle loss but you really have to pay attention to the aging process and how it affects you personally.

After reading several articles and books in addition to hearing the success of several friends and listening to the ‘experts’ I decided to try a totally gluten-free diet. A gluten-free diet is said to reduce inflammation, even out sugar levels, get rid of excess bloat and belly fat among other things. I’m by no means a medical expert so do check with your doctor before making a dietary change for health purposes. Again if you eat a gluten-free diet and it’s working for you I think it’s GREAT! What I experienced was something quite different from what I anticipated based on all that I’ve heard, read or seen.

I cut out ALL the bread (and other items with gluten) and did not replace them with gluten-free foods. I figured that cutting out all processed carbs would be beneficial. I ate more protein as suggested (2-4 oz depending on the meal) in addition to 2-3 fruit servings, 2 tsp of olive oil, lots of veggies (which I already eat) and at least one serving of a gluten-free grain. I stayed within my daily WW Points Plus target and exercised as usual. After one week there was no noticeable difference in how I felt and much to my surprise I GAINED 4 POUNDS!

Maybe I should have stuck with it another week but 4 pounds sent me reeling! Since the only real difference I noticed was being hungry almost all the time despite all the healthy foods I was eating I realized that although gluten-free is necessary for some people (for health reasons) and great for others (who feel better doing it), it doesn’t work for ME. I’m happy to report that after going back to not worrying about the gluten and limiting carb intake instead of cutting it out completely I’ve taken off 3 of the 4 lbs this week. Oddly I feel better, I’m not hungry all the time and it did make a difference in showing me that one size does not fit all.

What’s Your Body’s Story?

Every BODY is different and what works for one person may not work for another. What is good for one may not be good for another. When you listen to your body for feedback you will know what’s working for you. You’ll know by your moods, your energy, your weight and how you feel over-all. The most important thing to remember is that your body is the only one you have this lifetime. If you are doing something that you can’t stick with for the rest of your life it might be time to consider trying something else.

Listen to your body. What’s it telling you? How’s it feeling these days? How is your energy level? Are you taking the time to love and nurture it? Are there changes your body is screaming at you to make? Do you need more rest and relaxation? Take a moment each day to check in with your body. Your spirit will love you for it!~Shine Your Light Debbie

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Apr 16 2012

What’s Hidden in Plain Sight?

“It isn’t what you did in the past that will affect the present. It’s what you do in the present that will redeem the past and thereby change the future” From the book Aleph by Paulo Coehlo

Today I decided to finally clean out the cutlery drawer in my kitchen. Frankly it was disgusting and needed to be cleaned out for quite some time. I never seemed to have the time or want to make the time to do it. It actually got to the point that I would use the clean ‘silverware’ in the dishwasher instead of even opening the drawer lest I be reminded of how badly it needed to be cleaned.

I started my project with great resistance thinking it was going to take me hours when in fact it took me all of 30 minutes to clean and sanitize the drawer, the inserts and everything inside. Yes it took a total of half an hour to clean years of crumbs, dirt, spills (and other things not very recognizable) all of which could be seen in plain sight. Clearly for whatever reason I never took the time to address it even though the grime was in plain sight. Every time I opened the drawer I winced and promised myself I would do it ‘tomorrow’ then I closed the drawer until the next time. In life, as ‘hidden’ in a drawer used every day, there are things right in front of our eyes which for whatever reason we either can’t see, don’t want to see or for lack of a better term are hidden in plain sight until we are ready to see them. There are questions we seek answers to that have already been answered and we would know this if for just one moment we took the time to open the drawer (our eyes) and see them clearly.

Your answers are in plain sight even if they have a bit of grime covering them. Your answers are hidden in plain sight all around you at this very moment. Your answers live in your home, they reside in the people you surround yourself with, the conversations you have and more importantly; Your answers are hidden in plain sight within you. Your answers lie within your past, what energies you hold on to and even what you’ve already let go of. Answers show themselves to you every day when you choose to ask the right questions, see the answers and be open to receiving what is now revealing itself to you. It doesn’t have to take a lot of time but it does take a dose of awareness. It takes courage to open your eyes and look at your life and your patterns and to see what you don’t want to see.

How many times have you looked for something and it’s sitting right in front of you? How many times have you absently walked by your answer because you’ve gotten used to seeing it there and it blends in the background? What answers are hidden in your past which might affect the future? What answers do you seek outside of yourself which have already been answered but you refuse to see? Take a closer look at the picture on this post. Did you see the grasshopper when you first looked at the post? Do you see it now? It was right there all along but perhaps you missed it at first glance.~Shine Your Light Debbie

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Apr 12 2012

The Healing Power of Love

Love is a vibration that resides within you and lives on forever. It is timeless and has the power to heal. Love, in fact, allows the most powerful healing one can receive to happen. Once you have shared your love with another human being, if it is true unconditional love, it is shared forever whether you are together or not.While your highest vibration of love doesn’t change, the circumstances around how you love and who you love do. For those hurting I want you to know it is possible to use the power of love to heal.

Your expression of love and how you love changes over time. Case in point, you loved your teddy bear when you were three. If you still have that bear it warms your heart and brings you comfort every time you pick it up. At one time you loved that bear so much you wouldn’t let go but now you wouldn’t bring that teddy bear out on a romantic evening with your significant other. You express love differently than when you were in the 3rd grade or middle school or even in college. As you grow older you realize (hopefully) that it isn’t necessary to hold on for dear life for true love endures and never dies. It never dies because it is a part of you and it is in fact who you are. YOU ARE LOVE!

I rarely write in first person because frankly I find it challenging but this is a personal experience which I want to share so that you too can harness your own personal power of love and use it to heal. That said, here we go! I can honestly say that now in this very moment I’ve never been more IN love. No, I don’t have a new boyfriend. I haven’t gotten together with an ‘ex’ either. I am, in fact, still a single woman making her way in this glorious world; And yet I’m completely, unequivocally IN love! What prompted this love moment? Oddly it came after a phone call from an old flame who I haven’t heard from in more than 10 years. Now I admit that I’ve been blessed with ex boyfriends and lovers who still call me but this call was special because it took him 10 years to actually make the call. What happened as we caught up with our lives and took a brief trip down memory lane was that despite having fond memories I was still holding on to a whole lot of ‘wrong’ and not acknowledging the ‘right’.

Here’s what I mean by wrong: I always choose the wrong guy. What went wrong? What’s wrong with me? What am I doing wrong? Now I want to be clear that these things weren’t specific to this particular ex but nonetheless it became all to clear to me that I’ve had those pictures for a very long time and although I honestly thought I’d let go of them there was another layer to clear. During that very phone call I realized I don’t choose the wrong men! The men I was with were the perfectly right men for me at the time. The ex who called was the perfectly right man for me back then. We had fun, our love was true and the crazy experiences we shared will be cherished forever by both of us. We learned a lot from each other. I affected his life just as he had affected mine and prior to that phone call I always wondered if he got as much out of it as I did.

Once the realization hit that these were the right men THEN but not the right men NOW my entire perspective changed. All my questions about “wrong” turned into “what did I learn”. I began to see all my past relationships in terms of the LOVE I experienced. I was not wrong; There’s nothing wrong with me! I wasn’t perfect but I wasn’t wrong either. I was learning and loving and reacting based on where I was then. I forgave myself and as I did, every single relationship literally flashed before my eyes. Any lingering hurt disappeared and all I felt was LOVE and appreciation for every relationship in my life. This is what happens in a healing! Finding just one piece of the puzzle can heal years of ‘wrong’.

Now I do realize that not everyone is blessed with an ‘ex’ who will call them and actually verbalize how much a past relationship meant to them but that doesn’t mean you can’t validate the relationship and heal. The healing begins when you stop seeing yourself as unloveable and wrong. Your relationship was not wrong when you entered into it. When you fall in love, you are IN love…. YOUR vibration of love.Validate the LOVE and the fact that you have the capacity to LOVE that much!

Focus on the love and the good instead of focusing on what went wrong. Maybe you were learning and weren’t wrong! Maybe you were the best thing that ever came into that person’s life (or visa versa) but it wasn’t meant to be. Maybe in time they will be able to call you to tell you how much you meant to them but if not, it’s up to you to forgive yourself, let go of any ‘blaming’ and reconnect with your highest vibration of love.

LOVE! Shower in it! Surround yourself with it so you can finally see through filters of LOVE that there’s nothing wrong with you. You ARE loveable when you are IN love. Love is your natural state of being-ness and sharing that love by being IN it is the greatest gift you could ever bestow upon another human being AND yourself!~Shine Your Light Debbie

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Apr 4 2012

Letting Go is a Process, Not an Event

Letting go in many ways is the same as planting seeds for success. It has its own growth period which, not unlike planting a tulip bulb months in advance takes time to process. It might take hours, days, months and in some cases even years to process the growth you put in motion by even merely thinking of letting go!

There is always a growth period that accompanies letting go so it’s best to be ready for the growth process. It’s not advisable to resist the process as it will take longer if you do. Just be aware that the ‘events’ which occur before you actually let go, while you are letting go and after you’ve already let go are all a part of the natural process of growth and expansion as a being.

You wouldn’t hold on to something if it was causing a great deal of pain would you?

Letting go is difficult because there’s always a reason you held on in the first place. It’s important to get to the root of what you’re really letting go of. Many times the reason it’s so challenging to let go is because of resistance. If you are holding on to painful thoughts, energies or false hopes it’s a good idea to get to the bottom of it. What are you really letting go of? I can tell you with a great deal of certainty that there’s always another reason you have difficulty other than the one you see on the surface. Delving deeper into your psyche and why you hold on to energy not your own more often than not uncovers more to let go of. All letting go is a process of cause and effect. Once you discover the real cause or reason it changes your perspective and directly affects your life because of the growth period that ensues. Many times it can feel like your whole life has gone topsy turvy.

If you hold on to something for long enough won’t it turn out the way you want it to?

When you begin to see letting go as a process for growth and not as an event that happens in one fell swoop you will indeed become aware of things you weren’t aware of before. Those things were always there but you might not have been aware of them. If you really get honest with yourself (and it takes a lot of courage to do this) you may find that what you have difficulty letting go of is an expectation or outcome. I see this most often when I work with women letting go of relationships. They just can’t seem to let go of that guy (or gal) they fell madly in love with even though the relationship itself was miserable.

What do you use to fill up the emptiness?

The process and growth that goes along with letting go is different for everyone but there is usually some form of grief in the beginning. Be extra gentle with yourself. When you’ve had an energy taking up space for a long (or even a short) time there is a feeling of emptiness. When what you thought you wanted really isn’t what you wanted, you may have to let go of a dream that no longer applies. Fill up those empty spaces with YOUR ENERGY and new dreams! Your energy feels good to you and having more of your own energy allows you to shift gears, expand as a being and move forward with your life. Letting go and filling up with YOU brings joy and a sense of feeling alive to body and spirit!

Although letting go of energies takes milliseconds, your body needs time to process these spiritual changes and you will experience a new awareness of the growth you’ve probably already been going through. In other words, it starts to make sense. In the process of letting go give yourself time to grieve. Allow it to BE a process and not a one time event. Allow the process to happen without resistance or fighting it. Keep in mind you are IN a growth period but you are NOT your growth period. Once the energies have cleared, like the tulip bulbs planted in the cold bare days before winter you will once again feel alive as you experience a beautiful blooming in spring!~Shine Your Light Debbie

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