Speak kindly to yourself

Words Matter!

Speak kindly to yourself“Whatever words we utter should be chosen with care for people will hear them and be influenced by them for good or ill.”~Buddha

Do you choose words with care when speaking to others? If so, do you choose the same when speaking to yourself? Have you ever noticed how the words we use towards ourselves influence our path and direction? Are we punishing and hurting ourselves?

There are indeed times when it is not what’s going on in the world or how others speak to us that hurts but how we speak to ourselves. Those words in our heads that invalidate and keep us in effort or on a quest for perfection. The words and thoughts that come up about how we feel about ourselves.

“What a wee little part of a person’s life are his acts and his words! His real life is led in his head, and is known to none but himself.”~Mark Twain

Our inner dialogues are those things we tell ourselves which shape our entire relationship with the world. When a child is bullied or called stupid or we see someone berated in public we rally in disgust and outrage yet are we using those very same punishing and hurtful words against ourselves? When was the last time you looked in the mirror without criticizing something? When was the last time you told yourself “great job” and held your head high and proud? When was the last time you said “I love you” to yourself?

The words we speak not only matter when speaking to others. Words matter when we speak to ourselves. It really doesn’t, matter if we speak those words out loud. It is the dialogue in our heads, our thoughts, that affect our actions and how we perceive or are perceived by the world. When we use punishing words against ourselves we are not in a space of compassion, love and forgiveness.

“We are what our thoughts have made us; so take care about what you think. Words are secondary. Thoughts live; they travel far.”~Swami Vivekananda 

Just as we listen to others, it’s time to listen to what we are saying to ourselves. Remember the old adage ‘engage brain before putting mouth in gear’? How about ‘think before you speak’? We carefully choose the words we say to others. It’s time we carefully choose the words we use toward ourselves.

As human beings we will make mistakes and occasionally say or do unkind things even though it was not intended. It is precisely those times we must learn to forgive and love ourselves again. Have a little compassion for your own human condition. We are all human. We all make mistakes and more importantly we are all learning.

“All that we are is the result of what we have thought. The mind is everything. What we think we become.”~Buddha

I don’t suppose any of us can effectively stop those negative thoughts against ourselves but we can certainly pay attention and nip them in the proverbial bud before we become them. Never underestimate how thoughts and words affect and influence your life. Speak to yourself kindly with compassion, forgiveness and love.~Shine Your Light Debbie

©Debra Taitel 2014 All Rights Reserved

SpiritLightInsight.com
Daily Muse Home Page 

How do you want to be loved?

lovemoon“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.”~Oscar Wilde

As human beings we all seek to love and be loved. Love cannot be explained, measured or seen. It is a feeling that comes from deep within our soul.

There is no greater power in the world than love. It makes us feel alive, makes our hearts sing and brings a sense of purpose and contentment.

We seek love and yet it sometimes eludes us. We have thoughts of what we think love IS. We have thoughts about what we think it should be but when was the last time someone asked you the question “how do you want to be loved?” Better yet when was the last time you asked yourself “how do ‘I’ want to be loved?”

I must admit that I’ve never asked myself this question. I know “who” and “what” I’m looking for but never have I explored HOW I want to be loved. When this very question was brought to my attention in a recent dance performance I attended called “The Seventh Love” (an original work written and directed by David Kersnar, performed by Natya Dance Theater)  I realized not only how important it is to ask but how profound and powerful it is in the asking.

How can you love someone the way they want to be loved without asking them the question “how do you want to be loved?” How will someone love you the way you want to be loved if you haven’t first asked yourself this question to really know how it is you want to be loved? How can someone possibly love you the way you want to be loved if you don’t first love yourself how you want to be loved?

The “act” of loving is different than the pure vibration of love that resides within each of us. Accessing our own unique vibration of love, being that love and allowing it to pour forth allows us to “actively” love ourselves and others. We show others how we want to be loved by loving ourselves how we want to be loved.

Pure unconditional love is a vibration filled with acceptance, appreciation, affection and allowing. It is not until we connect with ourselves and the vibration that we can even begin to answer the question. The answer in “The Seventh Love” was as profound as the question. “By allowing me to love the way I want to be loved”.  Expression of divine inner love comes from a place of allowing yourself to love and be loved freely without judgement, attachment to an outcome or expectation.

How do I want to be loved? I want to be accepted for who I am and allowed to express that love without reservation. I want to be loved with respect and affection and allowed to love with respect and affection.  I want to be loved for the divine spark that resides within. I want to be loved freely, without judgement or expectation. As I love myself in this way I show others and it tells others how I want to be loved.

Romance your soul. Explore and discover how you want to be loved. Ask another how they want to be loved and allow them to love the way they want to be loved. Love YOURSELF the way you want to be loved and have a lifelong romance!~Shine Your Light Debbie

©Debra Taitel 2013 All Rights Reserved

SpiritLightInsight.com
Daily Muse Home Page

Like This!