There are some people in this world who suck the life right out of you! You know the ones I’m talking about. They are energy vampires. These people demand your attention and don’t respect your time, energy or space. They test your patience, tax your last nerve and you are literally drained and exhausted when you’re around them. Energy vampires are very real and once they’ve gotten their fangs into you it is not only exhausting but the encounter can literally haunt you for days, months or in some cases even years!
Energy vampires don’t always know they are sucking the life out of you. They walk around like zombies full of negativity, drama and pain which they pass around until someone (who is usually trying to help them) becomes the dumping ground. The more you try to help by giving them advice, giving them your valuable time & energy and giving them a forum to vent, the more you give away. That’s a lot of giving! Not to sound like Dr. Phil but what are you receiving from this relationship?
Yes, there are energy vampires out there but it is beneficial to look at your part in the relationship. What generally happens is you’ve given them permission to do this. You’ve given up your space to them. You are healing them and allowing solving their problems and their life process to become more important than your own. When dealing with energy vampires as well as being exhausted, you are probably thinking about them and how to ‘help’ but you can’t solve someone else’s problems or take on their pain. Knowingly, why would you want to? It’s fine to want to help someone but if they can’t “have” the help you are giving and don’t take steps to heal themselves you might want to re-evaluate your relationship with them.
At some point after they’ve sucked the life out of you time and time again your awareness will kick in and you get angry. The funny (not haha funny) thing about an energy vampire is they’ve learned to do what they do much like Armand taught Lestat how to be a vampire in Anne Rice’s Vampire chronicles. If you continue to allow them to suck you dry, you have taught them it’s OK to do so. When dealing with energy vampires you will notice that most everything in the vampire’s life including friends, family and work relationships involve some sort of drama and if it’s not their personal drama they are probably complaining, blaming others or gossiping about someone else.
One reason you get sucked in to someone else’s drama is because you are sensitive to others pain because you’ve experienced it in one form or another. You’ll notice that you are most vulnerable when you are happy. It is said that misery loves company and energy vampires tend to bring you down to their level….if you allow it!
Here are a few things to do when there’s an energy vampire on the loose:
- Forgive yourself! This is important. You were in a sense ‘sucked in’ to the negative vortex. Now that you recognize what’s happening you can effectively take your course of action.
- Forgive them and clear the resistance! Forgiveness is a powerful way to clear energy. Energy vampires have probably been sucking people dry for a very long time and don’t realize it. Forgiving doesn’t mean allowing them to do it. It means forgiving them and sending them on their way.
- Set boundaries and own your space! Do this from a non-effort, neutral place. Owning your space is the best way to set boundaries.
- Value your loving nature, time & energy! What you have to give has value. Your time & energy has value. Think of it as if it were money. How much would you give to others at the cost of your own needs?
- Cut the cords and raise your vibration! If necessary, you may need to end the relationship. No one can take your energy or drag you down without your permission at some level. I know that’s hard to hear but it really is up to you.
Dealing with energy vampires is never easy particularly if you are highly sensitive, have health issues and/or challenges of your own. My friend Jen Reynolds addresses this in a great piece she wrote for her Fibro TV blog. It’s never easy to sever a relationship of any kind but sometimes it must be done for your own health and well-being.
Remember it is your right and within your power to say no and stop the energy vampire dead in their tracks! Call back your energy from the takers! Your happy life blood is yours to infuse into YOUR life! Help those who can receive your gifts and move on from those who suck you dry!~Shine Your Light Debbie
©Debra Taitel 2011-2012 All rights reserved