Awareness – Page 10

“She did not know yet how sometimes people keep parts of themselves hidden and secret, sometimes wicked and unkind parts, but often brave or wild or colorful parts, cunning or powerful or even marvelous, beautiful parts, just locked up away at the bottom of their hearts.

They do this because they are afraid of the world and of being stared at, or relied upon to do feats of bravery or boldness. And all of those brave and wild and cunning and marvelous and beautiful parts they hid away and left in the dark to grow strange mushrooms—and yes, sometimes those wicked and unkind parts, too—end up in their shadow.”~Catherynne M. Valente

I recently returned from a fabulous Mastery Retreat in Mount Shasta. As a Halloween party of sorts we were asked to put together a costume that will somehow show a deeper facet of our souls. A part of us we haven’t necessarily expressed in the world. For me, that meant having to look behind the mask I’ve always worn; the way I show myself to the world.

One would think it would be easy to create a costume of our own expression but for me it was quite difficult. Creating a costume to express who I am, meant I actually had to look at who I am and as you probably know, this is not an easy task.

Finally I decided to bring along a purple feather boa and 2 headbands. One headband had a halo and the other had devils ears attached. I wasn’t sure what I was trying to say but for whatever reason, those items seemed right. The best part about the story is after toiling and un-necessarily stressing I forgot to pack all the aforementioned items!

The night of the party, I showed up without a costume but with my amusement. A mic was set up for everyone to explain their fabulous and super creative costumes. There were inter-galactic light beings, emissaries of the universe, scribes, unicorns and spiritual guides. I watched and listened in awe of the creative expression! Since I didn’t have a costume, I was not going to approach the mic but then it hit me….

I have worn a mask all my life! I have hidden a part (not all but a part) of me, in essence, under a bushel, behind a mask, my entire life! I wasn’t supposed to wear a costume. I was supposed to take one off and be me. I was supposed to shine from the inside out.

I stood in front of the mic, with no costume and told everyone in the room I came as ME because I’ve worn a mask my whole life. I told them I finally took off my mask and here I am. I told them I took up personal narrative story telling to help me express not just stories of others, but to express MY stories.

It was very liberating to say “Hey, I’ve had this mask on and now I’m taking it off.” Did I feel vulnerable? Yes. Did I feel like I was standing up there naked with no costume? Yes, because it was the truth but it is also true it was the very thing I needed to do.

Dressing up and wearing a costume is fun! We can be someone we are not. We might even be able to express ourselves and share things too painful to express if we didn’t have that mask BUT at some point, it becomes more painful to live behind the mask; too painful to hide and disconnect from others and ourselves.

At some point we all need to take off our masks, express ourselves and show the world who we are. For every supposedly ‘wicked and unkind’ part we keep hidden there are brave, colorful, powerful, marvelous, and beautiful parts, just waiting to be expressed.

Are you willing, ready and able to take on a challenge? I challenge you to take off your masks and let the world see just a small hidden part of you. I know it will take courage so be bold and brave! In a world of so many masks, stand out by taking yours off and shining your light!~Debbie

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Debra is a gifted Clairvoyant Reader, Energy Healer, Author, and Intuitive Business Consultant providing insight and guidance to clients around the world. In addition to her clairvoyant readings, business consulting and healing work Debra also offers one to one personal empowerment sessions and leads meditation workshops to help people heal and awaken to their own truth and spiritual gifts.

“What are you going to do? Everything, is my guess. It will be a little messy, but embrace the mess. It will be complicated, but rejoice in the complications.”~Nora Ephron

Energy Work is Messy

Those who have chosen a healing path know that doing energy work is not glamorous. It’s just the opposite. It’s messy, extremely painful (at times) and the more you uncover the ‘truth’ of who you are, the more you begin to see clearly why and how things unfolded in the past.

One of the hardest pieces to wrap our heads around is when we finally open our psychic eyes to see how we co-created particular, and often painful, situations in our past. It isn’t an easy thing to see the truth because we must face the fact that at the time we (probably) knew or sensed something was off but didn’t listen to our inner voice. Hindsight at it’s finest. Oh yes, things seem to get ‘complicated’ and messy.

There’s no mistake I used the word ‘seem’ to describe the chaos that usually ensues once we discover that perhaps what we were noticing was correct! Things aren’t really complicated; they’re just painful. When we open up to truth our mind will go in a thousand different directions to think about anything and everything other than the pain we are about to feel when we open Pandora’s box. However, with acceptance of what was and loving ourselves in the present we WILL get through it.

Have you ever wondered why painful situation from the past seem to hold our attention as if a vice-grip has them firmly in place? It happens because they are “super-charged” with energy. If we don’t let go of past experiences we begin fueling or feeding the memory but here’s the thing, memories are illusions. They are pictures in our mind and the more we feed them with our present-time energy the bigger they become and the bigger they become, the farther away from the truth they are.

Embellishing expands the illusion

The more we “feed” or embellish our pictures the easier it is to get stuck. The reason it happens is because our ego minds take hold and act as defense mechanisms. Of course we don’t do this consciously but conscious or unconscious, the fact remains, the more we dwell in the past, the more we embellish and give power to the illusion and the less of our energy we have in the present for creating.

“And this mess is so big
And so deep and so tall,
We cannot pick it up.
There is no way at all!”
~Dr. Seuss

Deep energy work isn’t always smooth and graceful. For the most part we are not going to do one or two meditations and wake up without a care in the world. I know we all want it to be that way but it’s a process. A peeling back of the layers. It is a process of showing up as we are. It is a process of loving ourselves so much that we go beyond the fear of being heard, seen and vulnerable. To show up as we are, not who others want us to be.

It’s a risk to show up because when we do this work, those around us may not be comfortable with the changes we’re making. We also may see the mess as so big, deep and tall we don’t even want to attempt to clear it out.

Here’s where the reward far outweighs the risk because this is where we connect at such a deep level with ourselves there’s no going back.

“Vulnerability is not weakness, and the uncertainty, risk, and emotional exposure we face every day are not optional. Our only choice is a question of engagement. Our willingness to own and engage with our vulnerability determines the depth of our courage and the clarity of our purpose; the level to which we protect ourselves from being vulnerable is a measure of our fear and disconnection.”~Brené Brown

It’s takes courage to enter the realm of our own psyche. It takes courage to look; to see. It takes courage to accept and accept responsibility for what we have co-created by our lack of awareness or non-acceptance of past experiences.

Yes, it gets messy. Yes, there is a possibility you will feel crazy or out of control and yes, there is the possibility that your growth period will be painful BUT…. there is also a greater potential for healing and transformation.

There is greater potential for growth and expansion and FOR SURE you will be clearing a space for love, and truth and more of YOU to be present…in the present. What a gift!~Shine Your Light Debbie

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