healing – Page 10 – Daily Muse

Have you ever tried to let go and found yourself stuck in an endless loop of blame or continually asking “why, why, why” then wondering why you’re having difficulty letting go?

If you’re looking to make sense of things or waiting for an apology it simply may not happen. The fact is, it may never make sense and you may never get the apology you deserve.

Why is it so hard to let some things (or people) go?

Letting go has absolutely nothing to do with accepting defeat. It has nothing to do with failing. It’s difficult to let go when you are in resistance and if you truly break it down, trying to make sense of something is a form of resistance. Waiting for an apology or the truth or waiting for anything else you are waiting for, keeps you stuck waiting.

Maybe it’s time to open your heart, mind and soul to the lesson learned. Maybe it’s time to release the resistance and live again. You do have a choice in how you allow people to treat you. Maybe it’s time you forgive and love yourself.

Maybe it’s time to connect with God’s love. A love that “will bring people into your life that will love you, respect you, fight for you, show gratitude for your love and want to be a part of your life mission.”

“You might not get the apology you deserve. You might not get answers to explain the actions of others. You might not get truth that makes sense to you. You might not get people to understand what you went through because of them. You might not get communication.

You might not get maturity. You might not get mercy or even common decency. You might not get respect or the chance to explain your side of the story. However, you do get to choose how people treat you. God loves you enough to bring people into your life who won’t hurt you, abuse you, betray you, lie and gossip about you, psycho analyze you, break your heart or make you an option or choice.

He will bring people into your life that will love you, respect you, fight for you, show gratitude for your love and want to be a part of your life mission. The best part of this is you don’t have to convince them of your worth. They want to be there. They know your value. They know your struggles. They are in touch with their own faults and understand you struggle just like everyone else.

They won’t hold you to a greater standard then they do themselves. They care about you and don’t want to see you cry, feel discouraged or give up on this life. When you know the power of who you are and what you have to accomplish you will scratch your head in disbelief that you allowed other people to dictate who you are based on little knowledge of what God knows about you and your life purpose. Letting go isn’t about accepting defeat or acknowledging you were wrong. Sometimes letting go is realizing that God has something better in store for you.” ~Shannon L. Alder

“Sometimes letting go is realizing that God has something better in store for you.” Open your heart, mind and soul to that something better!~Shine Your Light Debbie

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Debra is a gifted Clairvoyant Reader, Energy Healer, Author, and Intuitive Business Consultant providing insight and guidance to clients around the world. In addition to her clairvoyant readings, business consulting and healing work Debra also offers one to one personal empowerment sessions and leads meditation workshops to help people heal and awaken to their own truth and spiritual gifts.

This is a guest post written by Chiron O’Keefe.

“Used to be I wore Rose-Colored Glasses. Had to, really. The early years were challenging, filled with drama, strife, agitation, and fear.

It would have destroyed my heart to recognize what my adult self would someday be able to properly assimilate. So I pretended, as many children do. A coping method. A means of emotional survival.

The Rose-Colored Glasses served my heart in many ways. I could *love* past the disdain or criticism or cruelty. I could pretend and close my eyes, and believe what served my heart even if it meant beginning a process of avoidance and self-deceit.

The souls who showed me affection and those who treated me poorly, both earned a fierce misguided loyalty. It was odd, looking back. Recognizing how I’d deliberately ignore bad behavior, or even pretend to myself that I didn’t notice.

Others fed into that. Guilt and Obligation were the go-to dynamic in my family and earliest friends. One trained me to never object by pushing my easiest button–my fear of being unkind. That one scolded me fiercely if I ever objected to being used or manipulated, if I dared to call her on her bad behavior or lies.

Objecting meant that I was Not Being Unconditionally Loving, which translates to “You’re a Bad Person.” In retrospect, it was classic psychological abuse, but what did I know? I wanted to love and so I did. My guilt filled in the empty slots where love belonged.

It took decades to allow myself to wake up. To gently remind myself that putting up with bad behavior is not kind but actually a form of enabling. All those buzz words to describe a simple truth: Letting others hurt or use you isn’t love. Guilt isn’t a natural response, and if that is the primary feeling, it’s not love. Unless you can say, “No,” instead of always feeling obligated to say, “Yes,” it’s not love.

However, those Rose-Colored Glasses served a valuable purpose. They taught me how to love. And without them, I felt colder and quite lonely. The world was starker in black and white, in lonely shades of grey.

It took years before I recognized the solution was not to discard them completely. Love is not a simple thing. People may hurt us and make mistakes, just as we hurt others. Sometimes the view is rosy, yet with a shade of another hue. All those colors require integration with an honest and compassionate heart. Sometimes love is messy, wild, like a tempestuous wave followed by a Chiron O'Keefe's photo. smooth pool of warmth and comfort.

There was one last step required. I had to make a promise to myself. I had to learn to say, “No.” To recognize that love is a choice, not an obligation. That promising to look for the best in another does not mean ignoring truth. So for me, having the ability to say “No,” meant I needn’t hide my eyes from what couldn’t be confronted. No longer did I have to don Rose-Colored Glasses to warm up a world of chill grey.

Today I view my world through a rainbow of emotions that stretch across my inner sky. The sunshine dances on the raindrops, and the occasional blustery storm encourages my inner trees to dance. I welcome all the colors of my emotions, grateful for my ability to feel without fear. I recognize my freedom to love or not as I choose. And in knowing I have this choice, I choose to love.”–Chiron O’Keefe

Chiron O’Keefe is a writer, philosopher, and musician. Currently working on a book of essays focusing on reality creation and self-love, she is a life-long dreamer whose experiences have taught her the value of playfulness and self-accountability. You can follow her on Facebook .

Many thanks to Chiron for permission to publish this amazing and insightful post. May her journey inspire you to choose love and….Shine Your Light!~Debbie

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