Above the clouds

Finding Truth: Keep an Open Heart and Act with Kindness

Above the clouds
Reflections on a wing photo courtesy of Linda Parris

“The real things haven’t changed. It is still best to be honest and truthful; to make the most of what we have; to be happy with simple pleasures; and have courage when things go wrong.”~Laura Ingalls Wilder

Reality is a funny thing. It seems to look different to everyone. As we move through our lives we share experiences that even while we are going through them we see and experience them differently than the person we’re going through them with. Each of us has our own ‘memory’ of an event which may be different from what actually happened.

Our ‘memories’ can help or hinder us in the future depending on how we viewed a particular experience. For instance if you grabbed something hot and burned yourself, you immediately learn not to do it again. That is a helpful and very real learning experience.

If we ‘remember’ a situation as being frightening and hold on to it, the fear grows out of proportion to what really happened. It may stop us, hinder our growth or not allow us to see a situation or another person clearly because we’re seeing it through the filter of what we ‘think’ is our truth.

A good example of how this can hinder us comes from a recent client. He didn’t sleep well or at all most nights. After a rather profound healing session he ‘remembered’ that when he was a young child, he was terrified of the night-time ‘monsters’ and never felt safe at bedtime. Fast forward to him as an adult and this fear literally stopped him from restful and peaceful sleep.

When we attach what we ‘think’ is OUR truth to a person or situation, what we are doing is relying on our memory which may or may not be THE truth of what happened. If there is pain or fear in our memory we may lie to ourselves and others because we do not want to face our own pain.

What if finding truth was more about sharing and communicating our feelings openly and honestly? What if finding truth is trusting our intuition and keeping an open mind and heart? What if finding truth is accepting we are seeing something through our filters?

Speaking our truth honestly and openly is not only courageous, it serves our memory. The truth ALWAYS comes out. It may take hours, days or even years but it ALWAYS comes out and when it does there is inevitably a mess to clean up.

There’s no right or wrong way to approach a situation as long as your remember to keep an open heart and act with kindness. “Real things” don’t change, memories often do. When you are honest today there is no mess to clean up tomorrow.

We each have our own truth and (hopefully) act from that truth knowing we each have our own perspective. The reflections of our memories shift and change and ebb and flow. Speak your truth honestly, with an open heart. Act kindly as you do this because your truth is different from someone else’s and if things go wrong take a breath and have courage.~Shine Your Light Debbie

Ready to begin a meditation practice or enjoy a guided meditation? CLICK HERE for meditations currently on my website or email me at debra@spiritlightinsight.com and I’ll send you a FREE stress reducing meditation.

©Debra Taitel 2015 All Rights Reserved

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Be Unapologetically YOU!

Be unapologetically you!“Be yourself. The world worships the original.”~Ingrid Bergman

Today’s Healing Message: Be unapologetically YOU! Sometimes we think and act through our filters of invalidation.  We say (or do) or don’t say (or don’t do) something based on what we ‘think’ another person wants us to instead of saying or doing what’s really in our hearts.

If you are acting the way you “think” someone wants you to act or you’re saying what you “think” they want to hear you are not only NOT being true to yourself but you are sending a message to yourself that strengthens an unconscious belief you’re not good enough or what you have to say isn’t good enough. When you act or react in ways you “think” someone else expects, you are doing it from YOUR point of view not theirs.

“A friend is someone who gives you total freedom to be yourself.”~Jim Morrison

A friend or lover wants to know how you’re feeling. They want you to be you. How can they get to know the real YOU if you’re trying to be a version of you based on what YOU think they think? No one knows what’s going on in someone else’s head; Especially what they are thinking. Probably the scariest thing in the world to do is to show you are vulnerable. Speaking your heartfelt truth and acting on what comes from the heart does make you vulnerable. When you are not being yourself, you give up your freedom. You are also taking away someone else’s freedom.

Years ago I had a boyfriend who repeatedly lied to me about something rather significant. Significant in HIS mind that is. He kept this big “secret” about himself because of how he “thought” I’d react. As a clairvoyant I knew he was lying about something but never really knew what it was. When I finally got the nerve to confront him he came clean but here’s where is gets more interesting. What he told me was SO insignificant in my mind I kept saying “and…” waiting for some awful, horrible thing to be revealed.

He repeated what he  had told me and said ‘there’s no more. That’s it’. He assumed I would act or react completely differently than I did based on what HE thought I would think. For me it not only wasn’t horrible it told me who he REALLY is and I was fine with it. What he did, in effect, was take away my right to choose. My right to be me,  to make my own decision and respond how I wanted to respond. Of course I understand, and understood at the time, he lied because he was afraid I’d leave him if I knew the truth. (I did eventually break up with him but not because of what he told me that night.) What he was really doing was projecting how he felt about himself. His assumptions about how I would react were based on his thoughts and his thoughts alone.

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Being UNAPOLOGETICALLY you is one of the hardest things any of us can do because it leaves us vulnerable, raw and open but it is precisely that vulnerability that strengthens and validates that who we are might not be so bad. Vulnerability is gentle strength and being vulnerable is empowering. None of us is omniscient and knows what another is thinking so what good does it do to project the feelings or thoughts we have about ourselves unto another?

Speak your truth. Work on being vulnerable and own it. Show others the true you and strive to be the best “you” you can be. Be unapologetically you! You might be surprised at the results!~Shine Your Light Debbie

©Debra Taitel 2014 All Rights Reserved

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