What you see is what you get. Dream on!

Is “Struggle” your Default Comfort Zone?

“Energy rightly applied and directed will accomplish anything.”~Nellie Bly

A few weeks ago I told my Mom I was changing up my diet routine and, in response, she asked me a couple of interesting questions. The questions were simple but thought-provoking. “Is it sustainable?” and “are you going to spend your whole life counting macros?” When I thought about those questions I realized that most of my life I’d been focused on losing or maintaining my weight loss.

The questions also reminded me of how many clients get so close to their goals then backslide or stall. What happens is that they (we) get stuck in the fear picture of what happens next? Most times the fear is not in our conscious awareness.

Why does this happen? Because just like me, many people spend a good deal of their attention, time, energy and often times, money in effort “trying”. It doesn’t matter if it’s losing weight or some other life-long struggle. There is so much effort going into the perceived problem that there is no vision as to what we would do with our energy once we actually reach our goal.

Think of it this way: When so much energy is poured into a problem, in addition, to constantly trying to figure it out there is the distress and frustration of not getting what we want and not knowing why. What also makes it so challenging is that the day-to-day struggle eventually becomes our default comfort zone.

Where’s your energy?

Here are a couple of questions to explore. What is/are the thing(s) you struggle with? What are the things you worry about or intensely focused on for so long that you can’t even picture life without that intense focus? How much of your energy is being taken up by trying to solve, fix or change things?

For some, it’s energy tied up in searching for a relationship. For others, it’s their weight or how they look and, for others, it’s lack of money or resources. To be clear, none of this is wrong or bad. It doesn’t really matter what it is. All of us have something in our lives we’ve intensely dreamed of, wanted or focused on so much that we throw all of our energy and into it.

Where you place your energy and attention has everything to do with how much energy you have for creating.

Ok, so you’ve put all your energy and attention into “fixing” this thing and can’t seem to get there. Have you ever stopped to look at how much of your creative energy you’re pouring into fixing the problem, getting what you want or changing your circumstance? Have you ever taken a breath, stepped back and looked at how much you’ve identified who you are with the thing you’re in effort worrying about? Most importantly, how much energy would you free up?

What would you do with your energy and who would you be if you actually got what you wanted?

When I ask that question I’m not asking how you would spend your money if you won the lottery, or what would life look like if you were in that perfect relationship. I ask so you can begin to think about what you want to create and where you’d put even a portion of your energy if it was available to you. It’s also important to explore how much of what you focus on has defined your direction.

So, where would you put your energy? What comes next? What’s your vision? Who would you be? How would you (re)define yourself? It’s not that you have to abandon or give up on those things you want. It’s about calling back your energy and, in your mind’s eye, have a vision for beyond the goal once you get there.

What you see is what you get!

Everything we want can happen when we focus our energy in the right places. It’s about creative vision, stepping out of the effort and, in some cases, totally shaking up our world to go beyond our default comfort zone. ~Shine Your Light Debbie

©Debra Taitel 2019 All Rights Reserved

SpiritLightInsight.com

Debra Taitel is a gifted Clairvoyant, Energy Healer, Spiritual Teacher and Intuitive Business Consultant providing insight and guidance to clients around the world. In addition to her readings, healing work and consulting Debra also offers one-to-one mentoring sessions to guide people to their own truth, vision and spiritual gifts. For more information, please visit her website. To schedule a session: Click Here

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Energy Vampires are no Treat! Here are Tricks to deal with them

There are some people in this world who suck the life right out of you! You know the ones I’m talking about. The energy vampires! These are the “friends”, colleagues or family members who demand your attention and don’t respect your time, energy or space.

They test your patience, tax your last nerve and  leave you drained and exhausted when you’re around them. Energy vampires are very real and once they’ve gotten their fangs into you it is not only exhausting but the encounter can literally haunt you for days, months or in some cases even years!

Energy vampires don’t always know they are sucking the life out of you. They walk around like zombies full of negativity, drama and pain which they pass around until someone (who is usually trying to help them) becomes the dumping ground. The more you try to help by giving them advice, giving them your valuable time & energy and  giving them a forum to vent, the more you give away. That’s a lot of giving! Not to sound like Dr. Phil but what are you receiving from this relationship?

Yes, there are energy vampires out there but it is beneficial to look at your part in the relationship. What generally happens is you’ve given them permission to do this. You’ve given up your space to them. You are healing them and allowing solving their problems and their life process to become more important than your own.

When dealing with energy vampires as well as being exhausted, you are probably thinking about them and how to ‘help’ but you can’t solve someone else’s problems or take on their pain. Knowingly, why would you want to? It’s fine to want to help someone but if they can’t “have” the help you are giving and don’t take steps to heal themselves you might want to re-evaluate your relationship with them.

At some point after they’ve sucked the life out of you time and time again your awareness will kick in and you get angry. The funny (not haha funny) thing about an energy vampire is they’ve learned to do what they do much like Armand taught Lestat how to be a vampire in Anne Rice’s Vampire chronicles. In other words, by allowing them to continuously suck you dry, you’ve become a willing participant and they know it!

When dealing with energy vampires you will notice that most everything in the vampire’s life including friends, family and work relationships involve some sort of drama. If it’s not their personal drama they are probably complaining, blaming others or gossiping about someone else.

One reason you get sucked in to someone else’s drama is because you are sensitive to others pain. At some point you probably experienced the same or similar pain and you know how it feels. Take notice that you are most vulnerable when you are happy. It is said that misery loves company and energy vampires tend to bring you down to their level. It should come as no surprise that dealing with energy vampires is not easy.

If you are highly sensitive, have health issues and/or challenges of your own it is important to care for yourself first. Also, unfortunately,  you might have to end the relationship with your vampire friend. It’s never easy to sever a relationship of but sometimes it must be done for your own health and well-being.

Here are a few things to do when there’s an energy vampire on the loose:

  1. Forgive yourself! This is important. You were in a sense ‘sucked in’ to the negative vortex. Now that you recognize what’s happening you can effectively take your course of action.
  2. Forgive them and clear the resistance! Forgiveness is a powerful way to clear energy. Energy vampires have probably been sucking people dry for a very long time and don’t realize it. Forgiving doesn’t mean allowing them to do it. It means forgiving them and sending them on their way.
  3. Set boundaries and own your space! Do this from a non-effort, neutral place. Owning your space is the best way to set boundaries.
  4. Value your loving nature, time & energy! What you have to give has value. Your time & energy has value. Think of it as if it were money. How much would you give to others at the cost of your own needs?
  5. Cut the cords and raise your vibration! If necessary, you may need to end the relationship. No one can take your energy or drag you down without your permission at some level. I know that’s hard to hear but it really is up to you.

It is your right and within your power to say no and stop the energy vampire dead in their tracks! Call back your energy from the takers! Your happy life blood is yours to infuse into YOUR life! Help those who can receive your gifts and move on from those who suck you dry!~Shine Your Light Debbie

©Debra Taitel  2015 All Rights Reserved

SpiritLightInsight.com
Daily Muse Home Page

Debra is a gifted Clairvoyant Reader, Energy Healer, Author, and Intuitive Business Consultant providing insight and guidance to clients around the world. In addition to her clairvoyant readings, business consulting and healing work Debra also offers one to one personal empowerment sessions and leads meditation workshops to help people heal and awaken to their own truth and spiritual gifts.

SpiritLightInsight Clairvoyant Readings by Debra